The Saturday Night Joke 

80 year old Rebecca, who has never married, lives in Golders Green and is much admired by the community there for her kindness and her charity. One spring afternoon, Rabbi Levy calls on her. She welcomes him into her house and invites him to sit down while she makes for him “a nice glass of tea.”

As he is waiting, Rabbi Levy notices a Hammond organ against the wall. On the organ is a cut glass vase filled with water and he’s shocked to see a condom floating in the water. “Oy veh,” he says quietly, “she’s gone meshugga.”

Rebecca returns with the tea and buttered matzo and they begin to chat. Although Rabbi Levy tries hard not to mention the vase and its content, he just can’t avoid raising the subject. “Rebecca,” he says, pointing to the vase, “Vos is dos?”

“That’s my miracle,” she replies. “I was walking down Hendon Road last November when I found a little packet on the ground. When I opened it, the instructions said it would prevent disease if put on the organ and kept it wet. And guess what, Rabbi? I haven’t had a cold all winter.”