THE BRANDON BULLSHIT PILES HIGHER
From Jeff Childers
Biden issued a massive new executive order yesterday that sweeps through every agency in the U.S. government, with the awkward title, “Executive Order on Advancing Biotechnology and Biomanufacturing Innovation for a Sustainable, Safe, and Secure American Bioeconomy.”
It’s the E.O. on A.B.B.I.S.S.S.A.B!
The order sets the driving policy of the Biden Administration to massively increase investment in bioengineering and manufacturing, because “[t]he COVID-19 pandemic has demonstrated the vital role of biotechnology and biomanufacturing in developing and producing life-saving diagnostics, therapeutics, and vaccines that protect Americans and the world.”
Stop laughing! He’s serious, pay attention.
Biden’s latest mega-order claims that the government has a CRITICAL NEED; a need to re-program people like robots. I’m not making that up. Here’s exactly what the E.O. says:
We need to develop genetic engineering technologies and techniques to be able to write circuitry for cells and predictably program biology in the same way in which we write software and program computers[.]
Haha! “Predictably program biology.” In case you missed the memo in second grade, YOU are biology, partner. Biden wants you to be predictable. Like a computer program. No pesky software bugs. No garbage in, garbage out. No MAGA extremism.
Haha, this is so over the top I’m starting to think they’re deliberately trolling us. I’m also sensing that the robot program must be struggling, since Biden seems to think it’ll be easier to re-program US than our metallic assistants.
Anyway, within the next two months, the order requires the Secretaries of HHS, Energy, Agriculture, and Commerce, plus the Director of the National Science Foundation, to come up with recommended programs to incorporate biotechnology and biomanufacturing into nearly every aspect of American government, “in order to further societal goals.”
Sounds legit, right?
After the agency heads turn in their proposals, the E.O. gives the OMB and other agencies about 3 months to “develop a plan (implementation plan) to implement the recommendations in the reports. “ They have to “solicit input” from “experts” on ethics, environmental sustainability and environmental justice, whatever that is, and however it is different from regular “justice.”
Soliciting input is not the same as following input.
Then, within two years, the agencies will have to report on how well they’ve implemented the bioengineering plans.
The two words of greatest interest are so broadly defined in the E.O. that they aren’t particularly helpful:
(b) The term “biotechnology” means technology that applies to or is enabled by life sciences innovation or product development.
(c) The term “biomanufacturing” means the use of biological systems to develop products, tools, and processes at commercial scale.
Now. I know what you’re thinking. You want to talk about the awful dystopian implications of predictably reprogramming everybody’s cells, but that’s bait.
Think about the timing. Right before mid-terms.
The real story is, the gold rush is on! Aside from anything else this order might actually accomplish, it will positively be a HUGE cash grab. Nearly every federal agency is going to be wanting to buy new products with the “bioengineered!” label on them. Every federal agency is going to be soliciting grants for products and services that help achieve the new bio-plans. Every federal agency will be handing out lucrative low-accountability bio-contracts to its special friends, like candy at Halloween. Some for you, some for you, and some for YOU!
It might be even bigger than the Covid Gold Rush.
So here we are, less than 60 days out from the midterms, and Biden is offering a brand-new gold rush, a massive across-the-board federal purchasing program that depends on a cooperative Congress to fund it. It’s an offer to corporate America — forget about the supply chain! Forget about mandates! Forget about CRT!
Because, if the right people get elected, we’ll shower you all with crisp, newly printed cash. And remember, you’ll only get the money if you play ball. They’ll remember who their friends were — and weren’t — during the elections.
And as a side benefit, the E.O. is bioengineered to spin up MAGA extremists and the medical freedom lobby, who are expected to decry and condemn the E.O., which will turn MAGA into a threat to anybody who stands to make oodles of money from all the proposed new programs.
Don’t take that bait! I’m not saying you should relax into this, just wait till the day after the elections, and then be smart about it.
Now we know why Joe Biden has been on vacation for the entire summer. They were resting him up for all this stuff he’s doing now, from his Great Big Hate Speech to his stump speeches and executive orders. It’s all about the midterms.