Okay it’s the weekend so time for a silly short story after a long week at the tent 🙂

Before we do some important disclaimers below:


Your investments in PM’s can fall for no reason whatsoever and there are other investments other than precious metals and miners. (Yeah right, but I bet they make money and who wants that?)

This story is a work of fiction (a bit like my investment portfolio). Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental, honestly!

The author would also like to apologise to those members of the tent not included in the story, but after the lawsuits have been settled following this episode, the author has the Optional of including more members in episode 2.

Episode 1 – A New Hope

A long long time ago in a galaxy far away the dark side of the force led by the dark lord, Darth Ken, began to undermine the gold bulls by drawing a death chart known as the ‘Fractal of Doom’. This fractal was designed to destroy all hope in the gold bull market by predicting that GDX would fall to $8 by the end of 2017.

The gold bulls led by Obi Wan Spock (I know mixing different Sci-Fi movie characters, but I have to work with what I have), began to fight against the dark forces aided by his Padawan, Skywalker Fully, who legend had it wears a gold crown to denote his pureness. (personally, I think it is because he likes bling!)

Skywalker Fully was dispatched by Obi wan to be trained by a great master of EWT Yoda Avi to try and find a way to defeat the Death Chart. After many months of training Skywalker Fully left Avi and was still completely clueless about EWT, and who can blame him, 3 up 2 down 3 round the back, blah blah blah, only an EWT Yoda like Avi could hope to understand it.  – Should have gone to Pedro 🙂

So, Skywalker Fully set of to give Obi wan Spock the bad news, but as luck would have it he came across 2 droids lost in the desert. R2D2 Plunger (well he must be a droid as nothing else explains what he can do) and 3-CP0 North Star (I know what a coincidence) and they had a secret message for him from Princess OddJob (okay sidebar)

Message from the author– Okay now I know there will be many disappointed members of the tent who will have wanted to play the part of Princess Leia especially as Jabba the Hutt will be in episode 2, but I am writing this crap story and so I get to choose my character and that is that.

So back to the story:

The message from Princess OddJob was about a chart that Skywalker Fully had drawn when he was a child and had forgotten all about. (I know Fully was never a child and was born fully formed, but just go with it). Fully remembered drawing a chart of the HUI that contained a fractal of hope. This chart predicted that the good side of the force would propel the HUI to new highs not seen for many years and bringing much joy to the gold bulls, giving them all hope of a happy ending (no Dave not that type of happy ending, this is a family story!)

However, before this could be accomplished they had to destroy the fractal of doom and remove it from the galaxy (aka the GT website side bar). So, Fully set off to give Obi wan Spock the good news.

Coming soon in episode 2 – ‘The empire strikes back and miners fall yet again before the big rise’!! 

Spoiler alert – Questions that will probably not be answered in episode 2:

Will Fully succeed in getting the news back to Spock or will he succumb to the dark side and turn out to be the son of Darth Ken?

Will we ever make any money from PMs and miners in our lifetimes?

Will Rambus be in the next episode and turn out to be Count Dooku or General Grievous? (my money is on General Grievous as that would be so right)

Will Graddhy be caught out trying to big up the price or uranium so he can sell off his surplus stock from building the Death Chart?

Who is Eagleseagle and does he have wings?

What the hell has happened to Washer and is he still grounded by his mum?

Will I ever get a date with Natalie Portman? (well we all have unfulfilled fantasies).

Can’t wait to find out what happens next? Visit my new website for a free one month trial:


Keep smiling and have a great weekend all. Now I am off to drink some 15 year El Dorado Rum and get my tin hat on 🙂

Oh and a big thanks to Fully for running this site which cannot be easy with the mix of strong personalities and opinions. Remember, even the darkest nights have a Dawn.