JD! Just got off the plane. Headed down to watch the fights. Do we have a fight coming up?”

“No idea, sir. I’m still in Islamabad.”

“Ah. Yeah, I get it. You’re back at the hotel. Gonna fly out tomorrow.”

“Well, sir. I’m still on site.”

“On site?! What the hell are you on site for?”

“We’re still negotiating, sir.”

“Negotiating?! It’s been 17 hours!”

“I’m really making some headway, sir. I just took a shower. And you know how that goes. I have the PERFECT responses that will allow us to come home with a deal for you and for the American people!”

“JD. It’s okay. It is okay, JD. I don’t need a deal that bad. If they won’t save themselves, then you don’t need to save them.”

“Nope. No. This, sir, is my Super Bowl.”

“The Super Bowl was 4 quarters, JD. You’re working on 4 days over there.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t hear no bell. I can do this all day.”

“Apparently that’s a literal statement. Did you get any headway?”

“No, sir.”

“What? They won’t give up the uranium?”

“They said they have a God given right to uranium, sir.”

“Well, that’s okay! Cause I’m about to secure my God given right to their fuckin’ oil, and we’ll see how they sound after that.”

“No, sir. I can do this.”

“Do what?”

“Get a deal!”

“Oh, I’m gonna get a deal. I’m gonna kill so many of those crazy bastards that they’re sending Marco to negotiate on their behalf. Come the hell home. You’re in ISLAMABAD!”

“Can’t talk, sir. I gotta get back in there!”

“… you know what? Knock yourself out. I need a Diet Coke.”